суббота, 18 октября 2008 г.

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Today is the day I was told that my daughter is lying,and she has been doing it a lot in the past week.Unlike her mother, I was not surprised to hear this, because I have been preparing for it.I know that she is no longer a toddler, but a "Big Girl", who rides on the bus with all of the other "big kids", and she is starting school with hundreds of them. A lot of parents under-estimate the impact of being in a school with hundreds of kids,who have been all taught different morals,guidelines, and expectations.When she goes to school, she is experiencing lying with kids around her, not realizing the full effect of what a lie is yet.

Sure,she understands that she upsets you when she tells you a lie.This is a stage, but you must lovingly reinforce that you want her to always be honest with you, and that you are always on her side.

We as fathers need to reinforce that they should talk to us about any and everything.We need to state the need for total honesty between us, and that we retain the right to voice an objection, and will always be on their side in ANY situation.Daughters in particular will be looking to their fathers for enforcement of the rules,but with a different direction that mommy went with�.We need to talk to them about the problem and disagreements with their actions, but not in a condemning way but from a place of love.I want my daughter to talk to me about everything in life,and you should too.I am sure that I will not like some things that she tells me,but at least she told me, which should be our primary goal.

I welcome this "stage" in my daughters life,because it will give me a chance to teach her the security that she has in me, along with comforting me with the fact the she tells me everything.I am going to have a big talk with her about this mistake,and I will make sure that she knows that if you lie to people and betray trust,then they will not like you as much.She needs to know that trust is the most important part in EVERY kind of relationship.And it is very possible that you cannot ever get that trust back again.In my opinion, this revelation to your child is much worse, then putting hot sauce in their mouths.

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